Knowing that most people are not good listeners, I’ve tried something on a number of people. When someone asks me how many children Evy and I have, I’ll say, “Three—one of each!” Most folks never really pick up on the “one of each” part! No doubt about it, listening can be hard work. I’ve read that at least seventy percent of our waking hours are spent in verbal communications, and forty-five percent of that time is spent in listening. Hence, the better we listen, the better we communicate. As a small boy, I learned the following lines:

A wise old owl sat in an oak;
The more he saw the less he spoke;
The less he spoke the more he heard;
Why can’t more of us be like that wise old bird?

Theodore Roosevelt (1858-1919) was a doer-—a man of action—-but was also known as one who graciously gave people a listening ear. Stiff, mindless pleasantries frustrated the President to no end. In his position, Roosevelt attended many parties and other social events. Knowing that many people are not good listeners, the President began a little experiment. Whenever he was in the presence of someone who chattered on and on, but who did not really say anything in the process, Roosevelt would casually remark, “I murdered my grandmother this morning.” He used this experiment again and again, but most folks never even heard what he said. But one observant person did hear. Upon hearing the President’s remark, the man leaned over and whispered to Roosevelt, “I’m sure she had it coming to her!”

Since it is difficult to learn and talk at the same time, someone has said, “Train yourself to listen; you’ll be amazed at what you can learn when your mouth is shut!” The writer James (1:19) gives us this admonition: “Everyone should be quick to listen (and) slow to speak.” When we talk too much and listen too little, we communicate to others that we think our ideas are much more important than theirs. In this verse, James wisely advises us to reverse the process!

Because we have two ears and only one tongue, that probably means we should be hearing twice as much as we’re speaking. The only way to find out what you’re missing is to start listening!